Humour of Racing

NEW TRICKS COMES TO BELMONT

 

Before the first race at Belmont on Wednesday June 17 I thought Lucy Warwick and Ryan Hill were auditioning for the show New Tricks.

If you are not familiar with the BBC show, shown on the ABC, it involves veteran police officers of UCOS (Unsolved Crimes and Open Case Squad) investigating cases that have long gone cold.

Most of the squad are old ‘plods’ put back into work.

So why do I think young riders like Lucy and Ryan qualify for such a role.

Well, for starters while Lucy is clearly going to win the Apprentice Jockey premiership, in her first full year, she is dead slow when it comes to mounting up!

Believe me, while she is great in the saddle she gets run off her legs when the pace goes on in the mounting yard.

Please explain? I hear you say, in the best traditions of Pauline Hanson.

Lucy was on Foxinator in the first race (sixth) and obviously the galloper thought she was too slow mounting and he decided it was time to get on the track. With Lucy running alongside she just couldn’t ‘go the pace, early,’ and Foxinator was brought back to her by a very smart strapper who I am going to keep my eyes on.

As for Ryan he decided to go one better, emulating Hopalong Cassidy (aka William Boyd) the famous black clad fictional cowboy of film and TV.

With trainer Vern Brockman bent over like the Hunchback of Notre Dame, trying to leg Ryan up, on The Girl of Vasse, this too became a Hill too far! (Sorry, the Devil made me write that pun).

The filly had unbalanced Hill by throwing her head up as he tried to mount. So, with Brockman, often known as the Earl of Vasse, running along bent over and hanging on to the jockey’s ankles, it was a case of the hunchback, Quasimodo meeting Hopalong!

Finally, Ryan stopped doing the hop-step and jumped, into the saddle. Vern’s back should come good in another six months.

 His mount eventually finished last after losing ground at the start.

Just as well you have me at the races to capture these momentous events.

You simply can’t beat Old Tricks.